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Happy and adolescence in the same sentence, is it possible? Can you be happy and a teenager at the same time? Is it possible to have a happy teenager at home? Are there miracles? As parents, we think that having a teenager at home is like being warned of climate change, which is never how we have been told it would be. What do you need to achieve happiness? Next, we give you some keys that Your teenager needs you to remember to be happy as a family.
1. We must be with them, without being too noticeable
Our children see us as that piece of pizza that you want to separate from the rest but that, due to the melted cheese on top, is not so easy. This is how they must see us; they pull and pull to separate and be autonomous and independent and yet the cheese does not let them be 100% themselves.
This is the first idea that we must understand for them to be happy. We have to be but without being noticed. They say they don't want to see us, for example, in their sporting activities but when they go out on the track, they take a look at the stands to see if we are there. And there we must be, in the last row (of course). So we are with them, but without it being noticed ...
2. We must listen to them when they want to talk
It happens the same way when they feel like talking. We have to be whatever time it isThat, I anticipate you, it will be when you are most tired or tired, when you have more work or when you feel like disconnecting from the mundane day. There your teenager will appear and tell you: "Mom / Dad, come on, I want to talk." Do not hesitate! Go and take advantage!
In addition, you must be careful with the conversation, because it is not the same that you tell them 'we have to talk' - which will sound like the typical roll speech (which they already presume to know) -, than when it is the opposite, and they tell you they to you. You only have to say monosyllables, follow the conversation, but without entering to discuss, debate or give an opinion ... Your teenage children will only want to hear: 'yes! Good! Of course! Ok!' ... and so on. weather. Remember! It is their moment, not yours. They they want to feel heard.
3. Be flexible about your role in housework.
Do not expect them to help around the house, their head is not in tidying the bedroom, picking up clothes or setting the table at mealtime. His mind is on the girl or boy he likes, on the clothes he will wear tomorrow, on what he will do for the weekend, on his friend's comment or on what he can do to have fun ... Forget about having help on an ongoing basis. They will only appear when they want to get something in return. Yes, all of a sudden they say something to you like 'Did mom help you?' Watch out!! They come to negotiate ... The sooner you accept it, the better. So you will be happy.
4. Try to put yourself in their shoes
I remind you that they are in a process of emotional, physical and mental change. What a cocktail in so little body! They can't seem to put up with themselves, so don't ask them to be nice, kind, or loving. Quite the opposite! His natural state is to be in a bad mood continuously And only when something nice happens to them, will they come out of their cave (their bedroom), smile at you and go back to their usual bad mood ...
And is that the emotional changes they continually hijack their emotional state. In seconds they go from being happy and content, to releasing a face of discomfort that breaks your schemes, puts you in sadness and lack of understanding, and also, they make you ask yourself 'And who is this? Where is my baby…? Where will that child be raised with all the love in the world…? '
If you take all this into account, I assure you that your teenager will be happy and you at home, too. It is his moment of development, join him! Show him your love whenever you can, don't despair. All the good comes and this too will pass.
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